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Scott said, “Sara, let me pull your tooth so the tooth fairy can bring you money tonight.”

Sara said, “It’s not about the money, Uncle Scott.”

And that’s the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.

Some people can’t handle the tooth.

The tooth shall set you free.

(I’m feeling a little corny tonight–way passed my bedtime)

To commemorate the celebration of my sister’s 40th Birthday, I’ve invited Mickey to share another one of his stories.

Take it away Mickey:

Hey, it’s Mickey again and at the request of Anita, I have got another story to tell you.

This one concerns me and a fair skinned beauty named Dawn who just happens to be not only Anita’s sister but also my fiancée. That being said, let’s get to the story.

It was a Saturday several years ago and not just the usual Saturday either, not for Dawn anyway. This particular Saturday was the last of two consecutive dance recitals involving her daughters Grayson, 7, and Sara, 5.

The girls were in three dances a piece and Dawn had to dress them for each and then go quickly upstairs to view each performance.

During one of her ventures up the stairs she turned her ankle. Well let me just tell ya, my Dawnie doesn’t take to pain very well.

She did manage to get through the recital but when I got to her house afterwards I could tell she wasn’t in the best of moods. So being the thoughtful fellow that I am I told her I was taking her to the movies and then dinner.

Her mood lifted slightly as we headed out the door. Once at the movies, I got my usual, tub of popcorn and drink. The movie we were going to see was Fracture with Anthony Hopkins. We settled in to our seats and seeing a smile come to Dawn’s lips all I could think was, “Mickey you the man!!”

Alas, her mood changed during the course of the movie. Dawn just could not seem to get comfortable; she kept changing the way she was sitting. I thought I was sitting beside a three year old the way she was squirming!

I asked her what was wrong and she said her ankle was hurting her. Also she said she had been so busy, she hadn’t had time to eat lunch. I thought the popcorn was lunch but she said it wasn’t, go figure.

The squirming went on for a little over an hour when Dawn abruptly stood and told me she was going to the bathroom. I asked her if there was anything I could say to help her but she said she was fine and would be right back.

My thoughts of concern quickly shifted to the movie and popcorn and without the fidgeting going on beside me, I  lost track of time.

I was totally engrossed in the movie when a tap came to my shoulder, with my jaws swollen from a hand full of popcorn I looked up to see two attendants standing over me. Reverting back to my younger days, I panicked, wondering what I had done wrong. The thoughts quickly faded and I said “what’s up?” coolly, popcorn falling from my mouth.

They asked me if I was with a blonde who had on blue jeans and red sandals.

It was then I realize after glancing at my watch, Dawn had been gone about 20 minutes. I told them I was.

They said she was laid out in the women’s bathroom and would I come with them.

As I filled my mouth with more popcorn (I must have looked like a pig eating from the trough) I knew I had to make an important decision; to stay or go. I mean that movie and that popcorn were getting really good!

Well the good angel on my right shoulder won out, I reluctantly sat my popcorn down and followed the attendants out the door.

When we got to the women’s bathroom, I peeked in and the sight my eyes beheld was right out of Wizard of Oz!!!

There protruded from one of the stalls were two legs and feet. The feet were adorned with red shoes. Those of you familiar with the Wizard of Oz should be able to recall the scene when Dorothy’s house lands on the wicked witch, her two legs and red shoed feet were all you could see.

I walked over to the stall and peered in.

There laid Dawnie sprawled out like a mummy between the toilet and paper holder with a huge black eye!

She said she had fainted from the pain in her ankle and from not eating. I asked if she was okay; she said she was fine and that she was going to lie there for a while.

She did look comfortable lying there with her head beside the toilet, the paper unrolled to where it was almost touching her mouth, (it was actually moving from her breath), clicking her red sandals together.

As I looked down at her a thought went through my head. “Man if I only had a camera because this was definitely a Kodak moment!”

Although the sight was priceless and trust me it was, I knew I had to get my Dawnie out of there. I reached down and pulled her up. Once up she said “weeeeeeee!!!!, let’s do that again!” I thought about it but I figured I had her up so I better keep her that way.

The attendants and I walked her down to the fountain area of Palace Pointe where we sat down and waited for the EMTs to arrive to check Dawn out.

After their arrival, the EMTs gave Dawn a thorough checkup, Dawn being a good patient, was asking for medical advice for every ailment she’d had for the past several years.

Everything checked out fine other than her blood pressure. Seems Dawn has always had very low blood pressure and after checking it three times the EMT told her if she had not been talking and breathing he would have figured her dead!

Dawn then went in to the long story about her low blood pressure.

I tell you the truth; she talked more in that time with those EMTs and Palace Pointe attendants than she had in the past year and a half we had dated!

When she finally took a long breath and was quiet for a minute, the EMTs seized the opportunity and said they had to go.

They helped me board Dawnie in my car and bid their farewells.

This story did have a happy ending though. Palace Pointe gave us two free movie passes. And you ready for this! FREE POPCORN and drink to go with the passes!

Oh yeah, lest I forget, Dawn was okay too!!  Well other than the twisted ankle, black eye, bruised hip and the knot on her head she got during the way.


It is my pleasure to introduce Mickey Glasscock as my guest blogger today.  In this picture he is saying, “You wanna “piece” of this?”  I wouldn’t mess with him.

Here’s his story about a hairy situation:

Hello my name is Mickey, an average guy in a topsy turvy world.

My future sister-in-law asked me to share a story about myself that happened several years ago.

I was 27 years young, enjoying single life and the club scene.

When my buddy and I went clubbing we would always dress to impress from the clothes on our back to the shoes on our feet.

I also made sure my hair piece was freshly washed and smelling good. Oh yeah, I wore a hair piece back then.

You see I began losing my hair when I was a senior in high school and by age 24 it was gone!!!

A baby’s bottom had more hair on it than the top of my head did. This was a very hard thing to live with at such a young age. The only time I didn’t have a hat on was in the shower and the bed. Believe you me it was rough times!!

Then I saw a commercial for hair pieces from a place in Raleigh and the rest was money in their account.

My “piece”, as I liked to call it, was removable. It fit to my existing hair using three clips (one on each side and one in the back) and velcro in the front. I had individual velcro pads which I stuck, two at a time, to my fore head (it made me look like a martian). After clipping the three clips to the sides and back, I’d pressed the front of my piece to the velcro pads and I was red to go!!

This gets me back to my story which was me and my friend going clubbing.

It had been a couple of years since I started wearing my piece so I had confidence in the way I looked when going out.

On this particular Saturday night we were going to a club in Raleigh.

Upon entering the club, my buddy and I went our separate ways and it wasn’t long afterwards I found myself dancing with a fine looking philly. I don’t like to brag but I felt I was a great dancer and on this particular night, I was really grooving.

The philly I was dancing with couldn’t take her eyes off of me; it was as if I was mesmerizing her with my moves.

Not only that but I also noticed people standing off the raised dance floor watching and pointing at me also.

Boy I thought, Michael Jackson and Elvis himself didn’t have anything on me tonight.

We finished that dance and three more before leaving the floor.

People were still looking at me when I saw my buddy motioning for me across the club.

With chest poked out and feeling like John Travolta in Saturday Nite Fever, I made my way over to him.

As I got closer to my friend, I noticed moisture in his eyes; it looked as if he’d been crying.

I asked if he were okay and after collecting himself and telling me he was fine, he grabbed me by the shoulders and pointed me at one of the many mirrors in the club.

You know, black lights used in clubs are amazing things, they make things glow and in this case it was my hair and as I stood there looking at myself, my head glowing in a greenish hue, I realized several things. The first was the tears in my friend’s eyes were tears from laughing at my green glowing head, the second was I probably wasn’t as good of a dancer as I thought because those folks and that philly were gawking at me for a totally different reason than what I thought and third and fore most was that you should never wash your hair piece in well water from your home.

Well-water contains mineral deposits in it, one of which is lime and these deposits aren’t harmful unless you decide to go to a club equipped with black lights!!

Well, even though the laugh was on me that night, it didn’t stop me from having fun; I continued to dance and had a good time pretending it was my dancing the people were looking at and not my glowing green hair!!!

Have you ever sent an email and later wished you could get it back?

Yeah?  Me, too.

Recently, I sent an e-mail with the word “dual” to an editor at a well-known publisher. Of course, I meant “duel” because my characters were to fight in a duel (not a dual). Quite humiliating. Fortunately, I get to meet the editor face to face and I’ll confess. Who knows, maybe she didn’t catch it.

Anyway, I thought I’d write about some of the funnier e-mail accidents I’ve come across.

At a former job, my co-worker was cleaning up an error I had made and sent this to the other party involved:

“I’m sorry for the incontinence.”

Oops. That’s  not a  good thing.

Just today, I received an email that ended with this:

“I hope this email is of existence.”  I could only assume she meant “assistance”. Because it is obvious the email exists. The assistance part I’m not so sure.

All this to say, spell check doesn’t catch everything and sometimes catches an incorrect spelling, but human error has the word replaced with something totally inappropriate–like incontinence for inconvenience.

Do you have some experiences like this? If so, I’d love for you to share them with me. Please leave a comment.

This should be my husband’s theme song:

I told him today after he was freshly shaven that I liked it when his upper lip is clean (he has a goatee thing on his chin) because he has pretty lips, and he agreed. He loves his lips.

It was me! I was the one blessed this Christmas with the family treasure. Read this post for details: https://putaruffleonit.wordpress.com/2009/11/28/the-christmas-gown/

I feel a great deal of responsibility. For one year I must protect it until I can give it away next Christmas. I’m afraid I’ll lose it or my house will burn down.

I think giving it away is  more fun than receiving it. I’ve already written my addition to the series of notes and have decided what is to be included in the package.

I wonder who will be the next recipient? Tune in next year to find out!

Dead body? What dead body?

I remember that line from a  The Wild Wild West episode with James West and Aretemus Gordon(not the Will Smith movie–anyone care to guess my age).  Right now, if you stepped into my house you would definitely think there was a dead body hidden somewhere within.

It turns out, our chest deep freeze has not been working. For how long we’re not sure.

We’ve removed all the rotten food, but the stench still remains. I have a strong gag reflex so my husband had to do all the work by himself. He’s a saint. Even though the freezer is in the basement, the smell permeates the whole house. I hope we don’t have visitors in the next day or so.

My husband threatened to use my car to haul off the trash bags. I told him he was out of his mind, considering he has a nice big truck bed.

I’m behind on my reading and plan to start posting my reviews in the next week.

Click here for a list of songs sung at lukewarm churches:

http://www.wayofthemaster.com/songofthelukewarm.shtml

It’s not what you might be thinking. Some of you know my little secret. Well, now I’m making it known to potentially the whole world.

I slept in a closet.

I can’t sleep in my bed (no, I’m not mad at my husband) because of back pain. I had been sleeping on a recliner in my bedroom.

My sister took her aerobed on a beach trip one year and I laid on it and thought, I could sleep on this.   So, I purchased a twin-sized aerobed (the kind that sits up to the height of a regular bed) and put it in my closet. Hey, it fit with plenty of room for me to dress in too. And I can sleep with no back pain. It is wonderful.

But…

This past week I’ve heard critters in my attic and the head of the bed is pushed up against the door that leads to that space. I don’t like critters. Especially mice critters.

So, this week, I moved my bed out of the closet and into the bedroom. There is plenty of room– I just had to move the recumbent bike into the closet. (I have too many pieces of exercise equipment that I don’t use. I guess I need to start using them).

Anyway, so now, I’ve come out of the closet.

Thought you might want to know, or maybe not.

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